1 AM Monday Confession

Growing up, I was taught not to be afraid to speak up as long as I don’t cause injury to others. Speaking about anything from my opinions and principles to my life and anything under the sun made me entitled to walk my talk. A lot of you read them in my socmed accounts and even get chance to talk with me.

I have this mindset of “paninindigan ko ang sinabi ko” but sometimes, it got me on troubled waters since not all the time that I’m right with my perception. These past months, I tried to keep silent about my struggles and how it affect me. A few people knew of my past on how I have trust issues and affect my treatment with others. A constant battle to trust someone or stay suspicious and reserve.

Few of them thought I’m just being uptight and kill joy but they never thought of me trying to hold the line of letting somebody in my walls. Getting outside my comfort zone is and will never be an issue. I may be an open book to some but it’s actually a tip of the iceberg.

I’m sharing this one to let the world know that each one of us has a constant battle with ourselves, whether they admit it or not, and how support system will help those who struggled more to live a life far from the chaos of being tied to society’s standards. Anxiety is not just getting worried, it goes beyond from feeling anxious.

For me, half of the battle is won when we fought back against our fears and speak up to let them know that we are still human capable of struggles to keep ourselves together. Society may criticize us all they want but showing vulnerability is being human. I speak up not to gain pity or popularity, but to show them it’s okay to feel helpless and vulnerable once in a while but remember to stand up three times when you fall back twice. We have to fight our inner monsters who have been stealing our worth.

For those who know someone struggling, understand and be their support system. You never know how they fought hard to keep it together. Now, I wanna say I’m proud of my mental scars because it takes a lot of courage and support to get over them.

To those who are in the verge of giving up, there is always hope and how my faith with God helps a lot. Remember, you’re not alone.

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MOVIE REVIEW: Meet Me in St. Gallen by Irene Villamor

 

NB: I don’t want to spoil anything but if ever I will, forgive me. This movie is just too much to keep it inside. For the official movie trailer, click here.

I’ve been wanting to watch this movie and finally, I did. The only thing that I wasn’t aware of is the fact that I need a box of tissue beside me while watching it alone (HAHA). I have a feeling that this movie review will be different with my first two reviews. I don’t feel like talking about the cinematography, sound scoring, etc. But I would like to commend the director, Irene Villamor for this movie that is bittersweet yet beautifully made.

Bela Padilla and Carlo Aquino also did a great job for outstandingly portrayed Jesse and Celeste all throughout the movie. They are very versatile artist who portrayed the characters naturally. I’ve been following these two with Isang daang tula para kay Stella for Bela and Bar Boys for Carlo and there portrayal never disappoint me. I’m looking forward to see these two in one movie again.

The movie Meet Me in St. Gallen is spectacular on its own way.  I may not be an expert on movies but I love everything about this movie. I don’t know to those who watched it will agree with me, but the rawness makes it beautiful. The feelings of Celeste and Jesse speaks a thousand emotions and just being true to themselves makes it more beautiful. There’s something on this movie that you can’t just pointed out while watching it even if your heart is breaking into pieces (I did. This movie broke my heart into pieces. The feels).  The emotions are natural as well as the lines are on-point. Walang nagkulang, walang sumobra. I really appreciate the beauty of this movie because the rawness of the characters made the story more appealing plus the story transition as well as the setting.

Below are my favorite lines from the movie:

“Kaya sorry, hindi puwede. This is not acceptable. Ma’am, I quit. I resign. Mahal ko trabaho ko, pero mas mahal ko ang sarili ko.” – Celeste Francisco

“You can’t believe in something just because it’s there. Kasi kung ganun ‘yun ibig sabihin, convenience lang ‘yun.” – Celeste Francisco

“Compromise is tantamount to sacrifice.” – Celeste Francisco

“Ayoko rin naman ng compromise. Eh, kasi wala rin namang absolute, eh. ‘Yong meron lang, ‘yung nararamdaman ko dun sa sandaling naniniwala ako. ‘Yun lang ang hawak ko. ‘Yun lang.” – Jesse Abaya

“Alam mo ang “what ifs” isa ‘yan sa pinakamahirap na tanong kasi maraming variables, maraming factors unless may parallel universe. Pero isa lang ang puwedeng posible, ang nangyari na.” – Jesse Abaya

“Passion ba ang nawala o napagod lang ako?” – Jesse Abaya

“Magkaiba ang malungkot sa mag-isa. Solitude is different from loneliness.” – Celeste Francisco

“Alam mo ba ang ipinagdasal ko? Ngayon lang kasi umayon ang puso at utak ko at sana tama sila pareho.” – Jesse Abaya

“Tama ka eh, kasi you’re my ideal man. ‘Di ka masisira sa akin. You will always make me smile. …Baka ganito talaga tayo, dumadaan lang. Never to stay. Never to stay.” -Celeste Francisco

I can’t choose one line from the movie that strikes me the most. Kaya nga sinabi ko na everything are on-point. Walang nagkulang, walang sumobra. And the song “You’re my Sunshine” by Moira de la Torre will never be the same again. Lahat ng feels dinala nito eh.

What I learned from this movie is you can’t just let destiny do everything, we also need to take the risk and make a choice. In the last scene, Jesse made a choice and took the risk to follow Celeste in St. Gallen (The place where Celeste wanted to go. Christmas Village, Switzerland) because he believes Celeste is the one for him while Celeste thinks otherwise. Even if Celeste loved Jesse, she still made a choice even if it hurts her. Sabi nga niya, na binago ni Jesse ang buhay niya, kailangan ba baguhin ang buhay niya?

Jesse and Celeste story is one of star-crossed lovers. Tinadhana pero hindi pinagtagpo. Siguro, there love was an epic one but for Celeste, she found the love that is solitude to another man. I think they met for a reason. Parang check point sila sa isa’t-isa but never meant to stay.

Everything goes down whether to make a choice for your own or let destiny and believe. The movie bombarded us with a lot of questions, not just to the movie itself but to our choices in our lives. All I can say is, Meet Me in St. Gallen came just in time for myself.

Above all, it is your love for yourself will lead you to find the solitude kind of love that you deserve.

P.S. I highly recommend this movie whether you’re single, in a relationship, or it’s complicated.

 

 

Complications of Excessive Workplace Stress

via Daily Prompt: Complication

Workplace stress can be a good thing for employee’s productivity to ensure the right momentum in rendering their services as expected from the business they are working for. Right amount of stress gives room for employee’s improvement and potential growth in his or her abilities. However, excessive workplace stress does not only make you physically “haggard” but  it also complicates into one’s emotional health and cause damaging impact to one’s relationships and home life.

Workplace stress can produces two outcomes: fail or succeed in your job. The workplace environment evolves from time to time which causes excessive stress to employees but you can do something to this situation by controlling how you react to these stressors.

Hogan Injury, a California-based law firm, discusses about excessive workplace stress as mentioned below:

What situations fall into excessive stress in the workplace?

If an employee has been exposed to a traumatic event in the workplace, if the employee experiences violence, harassment, or bullying while at work, and unreasonable expectations from the employee are some of the things that can be considered as stressors that cause excessive stress.

Excessive stress and workers’ compensation in California

In California, employees may file a claim for excessive stress on their workers’ compensation insurance. The employee must be able to prove that workplace events or conditions are the predominant cause of the extreme stress. While workers’ compensation usually takes effect the day you get employed, compensation for stress requires an employee to be working for the company for at least six months. The reason is that stress usually develops over a period and filing for stress compensation on your first week of working means that your job is not the predominant cause of your stress.

Tips to manageable level of stress

Stress claims are some of the most challenging types of claim to win since they are difficult to prove. It’s best to keep your stress at work at a manageable level to help you avoid filing a stress claim. Here are some tips that may help you:

  1. A burden shared is a burden lifted. The simple act of talking to someone who you trust about stressors in your work can help you. You don’t need to find someone who will fix all your problems for you, what you need is someone who will listen. Try to cultivate a reliable support system inside and outside of the workplace.
  2. Start getting healthy.– People tend to overwork themselves when they are under a lot of stress in their workplace. They think that working through the stress will help them, but this could only worsen the situation. Try to make time to do physical exercises; physical exercise help produce endorphins which can elevate your moods. A healthier body also means that you’re equipped to handle stress better. Eating healthy can also help you manage your stress. Food rich in Omega-3 fatty acids can help boost your mood.
  3. Manage your time.– A schedule of your daily tasks can help you become better at stress management. If you don’t feel like you’re behind schedule every day, you won’t be feeling too much stress. Do not over-commit yourself and learn to say no if you know that you won’t be able to handle tasks. Prioritize urgent tasks and responsibilities that you don’t like doing since this means that you have the rest of the workday to improve your mood.

 

      To ensure one’s productivity in the workplace, it is best to manage one’s stress to avoid any complications to its own well-being. Stress can be good or bad but excessive of it can definitely produce complications. Let’s keep our workplace environment healthy.

*This post is in collaboration with Hogan Injury. Here is the link on the full article of excessive workplace stress by Hogan Injury:

https://www.hoganinjury.com/excessive-workplace-stress/

For writing collaboration, you can contact me here: louisserulona@gmail.com

Travel without complications: Check out Airbnb services

via Daily Prompt: Complication

Nowadays, traveling around the world is more convenient with the aid of technology.  Fixing your whole itinerary has never been easy and can now be done with just a swipe here and there in your convenience.  One of the things a traveler needs to consider is a place to stay which leads to a number of options from 5-star hotels, backpacker hostels, and the most popular home-sharing service Airbnb. For travelers who wanted to make most out of their budget without compromising comfort, security, and safety, Airbnb is a good option to consider to somehow lessen or no complications while we travel.

Hogan Injury, a California-based law firm, get us into details about Airbnb and its insurance:

What is an Airbnb?

Airbnb is an online marketplace and hospitality service for people who are looking to rent or lease lodgings for their travels. Airbnb offers a wide variety of spaces that a customer can choose from; apartments, holiday cottages, homestays, even hotel rooms and hostel beds. Although Airbnb doesn’t own real estate properties, they have become one of the biggest accommodation providers.

The Coverage of Airbnb’s Host Protection Insurance

Airbnb offers Host Protection Insurance, but this is far from comprehensive. The insurance is similar to premise liability where the establishment covers liability and damage claims when a customer, in the case of Airbnb, the renter, gets into an accident while inside the home that they are renting. The insurance also covers any injury that the renter causes inside the property, meaning that if the renter accidentally injured another tenant in the apartment complex where they are renting.

Airbnb’s insurance doesn’t cover the host’s personal property. If a renter damages any of the furniture, fixture, or other belongings of the host, Airbnb will not be liable for its repair or replacement. Their insurance also doesn’t cover issues that may cause damage or injury to the guests like molds or bed bugs. If you’re planning on becoming an Airbnb host, it’s still best to get a homeowner’s insurance for instances when Airbnb’s coverage won’t be able to cover the cost of injury or damages.

Here’s the full information about Airbnb’s Host Protection Insurance.

Tips to heko you stay safe ad secure on renting an Airbnb space

  1. Read and digest. – When looking at an Airbnb listing, it’s best that you take time to read about the place you plan to rent. Check the place’s description, the list of amenities available for guests, and the house rules. Check the reviews; this is especially helpful for you to know what previous renters’ experience was like during their stay. Take time to check the host’s verified phone numbers, social media accounts, and references. You can also look for hosts who already has an excellent standing on Airbnb.
  1. Keep all transactions within Airbnb. – Whether you’re using the website or the app, it’s best that you keep all of your communications and transactions within Airbnb; this ensures that Airbnb can monitor everything that is going on between you and the host. Airbnb can also safeguard your personal information better when you stay within their network, helping them to lower the risk of fraud and other security issues.
  1. No cash transactions. – Although Airbnb charges additional fees (percentage and reservation fees), it’s still best to use their website or app to book your accommodation instead of paying your chosen host with cash. These fees enable Airbnb to protect you or the host in case something untoward happens during your stay.

     With these tips and information, I probably look forward to avail the Airbnb services to my next travel.

*This post is in collaboration with Hogan Injury.
Here’s the full article about Airbnb: Hosts and Guest Protection:
https://www.hoganinjury.com/airbnb-hosts-and-guests-protection/

For writing collaboration, you can contact me here: louisserulona@gmail.com

A Lawyer’s Tale: Not a slight myths

via Daily Prompt: Slight

This is one of the blog posts that I’m excited to write about because as far as I am concern, I can totally relate especially that now I’m on my 4th year in law school and working with a law firm as a legal researcher. Contrary to popular belief and the so called pop culture, law school is not just about the way how the movie Legally Blonde and the series How to Get Away with Murder. Law school is more like college but a little bit intense and interesting. You just have to understand the law and enjoy the ride.

Hogan Injury listed some myths about the legal system and lawyers that are pretty far from reality:

(Nota Bene: Italicized paragraphs are my own opinions)

  1. Law school is scary and full of weird people. – Contrary to popular belief, law school is not some boot camp where students go to suffer through excruciating mental torture. It’s true that there will be times when you don’t get enough sleep, but isn’t this also true when you go to college? Law school requires plenty of work and a mastery of the subject, but if you want to be a lawyer, these things will be interesting to you. Another thing that people usually think about law school is that all the students are dull or “nerds” that don’t know how to interact with other people. Just like any learning institutions, the law school has a diverse set of students that come from different background and have different motivations.

I have to agree with law school of being scary because recitations is totally nerve-wrecking but you got to used to the whole process in law school as long as you read the materials by heart. They say sleep is for the weak for law students but believe me when I say that some of my law school classmates still enjoy the normal 8-hour sleep but for us working students, well 3-hours seem luxurious especially during exam period. Another thing, the students of the law are not dull or nerds contrary to what most people thinks. There are actually pretty interesting once you get to know them. Some even enjoyed a night of fun and drinking spree but still do well in class recitations even having a hang-over the next day. Some are even travelers and bloggers who gone away from law books once in awhile. Going to law school takes a lot of courage and dedication to stay in the long run.

  1. The courtroom is a lawyer’s playground. – As much as pop culture would like you to believe that lawyers spend their days delivering passionate speeches to a jury and prancing around a courtroom, this is not the case. It is true that litigation lawyers spend time inside the courtroom during a trial, but there is a lot of research done before they get there. Lawyers spend hours trying to build a solid case before they bring it to a judge and jury. There are also different types of lawyers that very rarely need to go to court. Ever notice how there aren’t many movies that revolve around tax lawyers or intellectual property lawyers?

As someone who works with a law firm, the courtroom is definitely not a lawyer’s playground. Lawyering is quite a diverse profession. It does not only revolve around the courtroom but it takes a lot of time spending of studying cases. I’m not really familiar in the law practice at the US but in the Philippines, lawyers are all around. They handle different kinds of cases and also do notarial services. It is seldom for them to focus into only one field.

  1. Being a lawyer means having lots of money. – Just like any other professions, it can be hard for a lawyer to find employment after graduation. Going to law school is not a guarantee that you’ll be able to find a job right away or that the position you’ll land will be a gold mine. Law schools also cost a lot of money meaning that even lawyers have to pay off student loans just like the rest of the population who went to college.

Law school is expensive. One of the reason why I have to work while studying. It does not only requires you to spend more time catching up with readings but also, to spend more on financial aspect. Work-school-life balance takes time to do it. And passing the Bar is not a guarantee to find a job especially if you choose to do private practice. It takes a lot of hard work and sleepless nights to earn and find your groove in lawyering.

  1. Lawyers are sleazy. – Probably one of the most perpetuated myths about lawyers is that all of them are liars and unethical. Contrary to popular belief, lawyers are held to a higher standard of honesty and integrity. Lawyers take an oath and bar associations across the country have their own set of rules that a lawyer must adhere to. One of the reasons behind this myth still being widely accepted is because lawyers are the people you go to at the lowest points of your life. People associate lawyers with divorce, criminals, injury, and damages, and the portrayal of lawyers in media doesn’t help.

This is probably the top most misconception about lawyers. Lawyers take oath to uphold the rule of law as well as to protect the interest of their clients at all cause. Maybe this myth existed because lawyers find ways to prove the innocence of their clients at all cause and people think that they lie about it when in fact, it take days to build a defense and gather evidence to support their claims.

    Despite the myths about lawyers and the legal system, it is still undeniable that the practice of law is one of the noble profession in the world. (*This article is originally posted in the Hogan Injury website and the above-written post is a collaboration)

To read the full article from Hogan Injury, a California Law firm, click here: https://www.hoganinjury.com/debunking-myths-about-lawyers/

ENTRY 02 DEAD END IS REALITY

The dead end of this feeling is what reality is, you telling me that it is not possible to have an “us”.

It was a special night with a hopeful heart that I professed my feelings for you but ended in a bittersweet way.  You played it cool and I did the same for masking the disappointment in my face is a thing I mastered a long time ago when it involves you and me.

Poker faced but I smiled bitterly inside; I expected the worst but I unexpectedly didn’t expect the way it should be.

For the longest time, I thought we feel the same and in the same page of mutuality. How I wished it was like that but no, it wasn’t. Reality has its own way of telling me the truth. And I could never expect it to be as kind as ever.

I barely imagined the downside of this story string inside my head because every moment with  you made me believe that there is something to be hopeful for but I should’ve known otherwise.

God knows how I said a little prayer asking for a sign if you’re worth fighting for. And I thought that one Tuesday night answered it but I was wrong in the long run.

The sign I asked was given by you personally; the reason why I was caught off guard when you handed it. That moment made me realize that you’re worth fighting for but I guess we have a twisted fate not involving you and me.

When I told you that I liked you, I silently prayed that you feel the same but things just never be aligned in our own desires. Sometimes, this lifetime just give us a reality check that not every story has a happy ending.

For now, my love, let me heal my battle scars in fighting for you on this twisted fate. I raised my hands up to surrender my feelings and laid out my last card but I still end up defeated. Funny how things shown me signs that there could be an “us” but may be I was just too blinded with the idea of it.

For the dead end, I’m going back to the start where there is you as you and me as me.

I’ll try to keep it cool and heal at the same time for the sake of our friendship and old times sake that made me believe that there could be an “us”. I am not saying goodbye for setting you free is a sign that I’m too good with goodbyes.

I want to say sorry because I expected too much from you but I’m never sorry for liking you too much to the extent that I lose it all at once.

However, I’m still thankful for all those moments you made me feel secured and loved. You’re one of the best things that ever happened to me.

Do know that you’re not a failure neither am I because you are a lesson learned. In learning you, I found myself.

As I was writing this post, I smiled at myself and silently thanking our twisted fate for the lesson learned.

What I have for you can be love or not but I’m glad I stumbled and took notice of you in this lifetime.

Finally, I can let go the string of hope of you and me. For now, goodbye my star crossed lover but I will still be your friend.

And you will always be my “so near yet so far”.

 

Go with the flow

via Daily Prompt: Tide

In the span of three weeks, I find myself in a calming state just like the ocean in a sunny afternoon. The past weeks been rough emotionally and mentally due to one revelation that you least expect it. I was on the verge of falling deep yet unexpected circumstances save me from free fall. I knowingly learn that I failed to keep the fire burning but with grace, I accepted defeat.

God knows how much I wanted to get angry with him but remembering the times I was happy because of him outweighs any grudges I felt. I cannot say I was ghosted but you both know that there’s this undeniable connection between the both of you but fate has another in mind. I know that I want him but does he feel the same way too? Are we on the same page?

Now, he’s happy with another girl. At first, it wasn’t fine for me but who am I on this moment? Ours was a hopeless case. It’s time to go with the flow in what fate has in store for us. No need to rewrite the stars. Maybe in an alternate universe, we were meant to be.

Right now, I have to go with the flow in my life. I may not be okay for a moment but I know I will get by. I know fate is not cruel, it just have its own timeline different from mine.

Ours wasn’t worth fighting for because in what happened, I find peace as calm as the ocean within me. I let go and I know it is the best thing to do and find who I am in this conflicted contradiction world.